🌿 Breaking the Silence on Menopause
By Donna Moulds – Founder of The Resilience Movement
Menopause. A word that still gets whispered, even though its impact roars through our minds, bodies, and emotions.
For millions of women, menopause isn’t just hot flashes and sleepless nights—it’s the disorienting feeling of not recognising yourself. It’s walking into a room you once lit up and now wondering if anyone even notices you. It’s the deep fatigue that doesn’t go away with sleep. It’s mood swings, anxiety, mental fog, and an aching sense of being misunderstood. And the worst part? The silence. The cultural hush that leaves so many of us suffering in isolation, thinking we’re the only ones who feel this way.
But I want to tell you something that changed everything for me:
You’re not alone—and there are answers.
When I was deep in my own experience of menopause, I wasn’t having the “typical” symptoms. I wasn’t drenched in sweat from hot flushes. I wasn’t tossing off the blankets at 2am. And because of that, I didn’t realise how much menopause was actually affecting me—mentally and emotionally.
My resilience was waning. I didn’t feel like myself anymore. And I began to wonder: Is this just how it is now?
That’s when I went on a journey of discovery. I was determined to understand what was happening in my body and my mind. And in that search, I came across Dr. Mary Claire Haver.
Her voice was like a beacon—grounded in science, filled with empathy, and unapologetically honest. Through her education, I learned that menopause isn’t one-size-fits-all. I wasn’t broken… I was normal. Just navigating my own unique hormonal shift.
Dr. Haver’s content gave me the tools, language, and confidence to ask better questions. She helped me get curious about what I could do—nutritionally, emotionally, and medically—to support myself through this transition. And let me tell you, that curiosity changed everything.
I stopped blaming myself.
I stopped hiding my symptoms.
I started advocating for my health and honouring my needs.
Now I understand that menopause is not a weakness. It’s a biological evolution—one we need to talk about boldly, with knowledge and compassion. And while the experience is different for every woman, information is power. When we know better, we can do better. And when we speak up, we make it safer for other women to do the same.
If you’re walking this path and feel like no one sees you… I do.
And so does Dr. Haver.
Stay curious. Stay informed. Stay connected.
You are not invisible—you are transforming.
📊 The Hidden Toll of Menopause on Mental Health
Breaking the silence on menopause starts with naming what’s really going on:
- 1 in 4 women consider leaving their jobs due to severe menopausal symptoms.
- Over 60% of women report symptoms of anxiety, depression, or emotional distress.
- Many experience relationship breakdowns, isolation, and identity loss—yet feel too ashamed to talk about it.
This silence comes at a cost: to careers, relationships, and mental health. Without support, menopause becomes more than a physical transition—it becomes an emotional crisis.
But here’s the truth:
👉 We can’t heal what we’re not allowed to talk about.
🛑 Why Breaking the Silence on Menopause Matters
When we stay quiet, we carry the weight alone. And that weight can feel unbearable.
For me, menopause crept in slowly. At first, I thought I was just tired or overwhelmed. Then came the fog. The forgetfulness. The sadness I couldn’t explain. But worst of all? The disconnection from who I used to be.
And yet, nobody around me truly understood. Not because they didn’t care—but because we haven’t been taught how to talk about menopause, let alone support someone through it.
💬 A Personal Story: From Silence to Support
Growing up, my mother never spoke about menopause. It just wasn’t something we discussed. So, when I began navigating it myself, I felt like I was fumbling through the dark—confused, isolated, and emotionally raw. There was a deep sadness in realising I didn’t know what she went through… and she never had the support she deserved.
At first, I tried to open up to my children about what I was experiencing—but they didn’t quite get it. They hadn’t lived it yet. And that made the loneliness cut even deeper, especially during a challenging time at work, when I felt disconnected and misunderstood.
But here’s the beautiful part… Things have changed. My family gets it now.
My children check in with me regularly—asking how I’m feeling, noticing when I’m not myself, and holding space for the hard days. Even my mum, who once carried her own silence, now talks with me openly. We’re healing through conversation. We’re closing the gap that used to exist between generations.
And in this season that once felt so isolating, I now feel held—by my family, by love, and by the understanding that vulnerability isn’t weakness. It’s the bridge to deeper connection.
🧠 Protecting Mental Health Through Menopause
The emotional load of menopause is real—and it deserves care. Here are a few strategies that have helped me (and the women I support) feel stronger, seen, and more supported:
- Speak Openly: Talk to your friends, family, and colleagues. Every conversation chips away at the stigma.
- Seek Professional Support: Whether it’s a GP who specialises in menopause or a therapist who validates your experience, your mental health deserves professional care—just like your physical health. See also: Mayo Clinic overview of menopause.
- Honour Your Needs: Rest when you need to. Say no without guilt. Your worth isn’t measured by how much you push through—it’s reflected in how well you care for yourself.
- Build a Resilience Toolkit: Journaling, gentle movement, mindfulness, and community connection. These are the same principles I share in my resilience coaching services.
👨👩👧👦 Menopause Is a Family Conversation
Menopause doesn’t just affect women—it affects families. When partners, children, and friends are invited into the conversation, we reduce shame and create safety.
Simple check-ins like:
“Mum, how can I support you?”
“I didn’t realise you were going through this—thank you for sharing.”
These moments of connection become lifelines. And they remind us that we are not a burden—we are simply human.
💛 You Are Not Invisible
Breaking the silence on menopause isn’t just about telling your story—it’s about reclaiming your identity in a season that tries to steal it.
Menopause doesn’t diminish your power—it invites you to discover a new version of yourself. A version that’s wise. Unapologetic. More attuned to what truly matters.
“This too shall pass… and when it does, you’ll rise with more fire and grace than ever before.”
“Menopause is inevitable, suffering is not.” — Dr. Mary Claire Haver
🎧 For more real conversations like this, visit The Resilience Movement Podcast.
Further reading: Harvard Health: Build Your Own Resilience Plan
